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Mariners play two hundred ten minutes in purgatory, not win



The Marines play at least two of these games each year. They are not always the most fun on the surface unless you really like pitching duels that have pitcher you've never heard of, but there is always something exciting about them. The Marines played Astros and who closed them out? Who said you sat down? Tommy Milone is a Mariner? The update is as follows:

  1. The Marines must play a very superior team.
  2. The marines are sure to have a left-handed jug on the team whose presence does not make sense. Has that guy pitch.
  3. Has the very superior team competition their strangest guy. Ideally, he is also left-handed.
  4. The marines must score a race early. Remember, many of the less-committed fans will have checked out the team for a month or two ago. Anyone who scores the race must be someone whom these fans have never heard of.
  5. Regardless of which leftist that the sailors ran out there, at least five scoreless innings have to throw and beat some of the best hitters in the league on the road. [19659012] That's just the foundation. The game can then be accented, but you will. It doesn't matter who wins. Fans of both teams must be shocked that this was even a game, much less a low scoring pitching duel. The marines are always bad and the very superior team is by definition good. Just that the nameless leftist threw so many scoreless innings should be the cause of the alarm.

    Tonight we had all the ingredients.

    1. We had the Marines, the eighth-worst team in the league at FiveThirtyEight's ELO ratings, where they played Astros, the third best team in the league.
    2. We had a bonus with pitching. The marines opened with Matt Carasiti, a completely unknown right-handed jug called five days ago, and relieved him with Tommy Milone. Milone is, of course, the left-handed pitcher whose presence does not make sense. Previous repetitions of this role have been filled by people like Andrew Albers and Aaron Harang.
    3. Astrosen beat Wade Miley, who is definitely their odd and left-handed.
    4. The Marines scored a race early! 19659018] 5. Tommy Milone actually threw five scoreless innings.

      Obviously I have cherry picks this formula from tonight's game, but tonight was a game I think I've seen at least ten times. I've seen Mike Montgomery throw full game shutouts and I think Andrew Albers threw at least one game with eight shutout innings. Blake Beaven did enough too. Whether it's Stefen Romero or Gordon Beckham who scores the lone early race, it's not really something.

      However, it is the accents that really make personality in the game. This one had some nice accents.

      And sweet:

      Unfortunately, Anthony Bass gave all Austin Adams' heroics a monumental thing to Josh Reddick, who tied the game and eventually sent it to extra innings. Despite an extraordinary record of 5-1 tonight, the team beat a derived Dee Gordon 10th inning single who set the table for the heart of the Astros lineup.

      Yuli Gurriel eventually and inevitably hit a walk away from home, putting a bitter hood on this bizarre sundae of a game.

      The marines did not win, but Austin Adams confirmed its status as an exciting up-and-coming reliever. J.P. Crawford in spite of his TOOTBLAN on the record had two hits and some clever players in the field. And Tommy Milone cemented as the surly, tattooed Andrew Albers from 2019 Mariners.

      I am looking forward to seeing this same exact game next year when Brett Anderson has somehow become a Mariner and throws five scoreless innings and Gordon Beckham finds his way back to us to hit his stuff for the year.


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